


The Last Road

by Infinity (malecfeels)



Series: By Your Side [10]
Category: Shadowhunters (TV), The Mortal Instruments Series - Cassandra Clare
Genre: Alternate Universe - Human, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, BDSM, Blowjobs, Bottom Magnus Bane, Cop Magnus Bane, Dominant Alec Lightwood, Investigation, Jonathan Christopher Morgenstern | Sebastian Verlac Being an Asshole, M/M, Malec, Morning Sex, Stalking, Submissive Magnus Bane, Things are starting to go to shit, Top Alec Lightwood, loving relationship
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-25
Updated: 2019-08-25
Packaged: 2020-09-26 07:14:10
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,859
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20385769
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/malecfeels/pseuds/Infinity
Summary: "How could I have missed this?”“You can’t beat yourself up about this. We need to think about what to do next.”“Next? He has always been a step ahead of me. All this time.”“Do not give up. There has to be something here."“He set this up for me to see. He knew I would come here. He wanted me to know all of this.”...Jonathan is starting to get too close. Magnus makes a big decision to end it all.





	The Last Road

**Author's Note:**

> Hi! New Update! I am so effing busy with everything but I managed to write this small piece. We are so close to the end. I am not so sure how how the story goes after this as I haven't written anything of it but we get to know Magnus' past in the next one for sure!
> 
> Hope you enjoy this one <3 <3
> 
> Warning: Stalking and disturbed behavior
> 
> Also excuse any grammatical errors.

Magnus woke up to a feeling of peace and not terror. Something was trying to burrow into his neck. Or someone. Any other time he would have laid the person flat on his back for getting so close to his jugular.

But this was a person he _loved_.

Magnus sighed deeply, slowly inching back into the warmth. The nose burrowing into his skin turned to lips kissing and suckling. He bared it to more attention and as always Alec didn’t disappoint. It didn’t take long before Magnus was fully awake along with some other things.

Alec wound an arm around his waist and pushed him onto his back in one smooth move. He grinned down at him, his hair falling softly against his face. He looked like he always did. Utterly breathtaking and beautiful.

“Morning.” Magnus whispered roughly. This few seconds of closeness and intimacy was enough to completely arouse him.

“Good morning.” Alec greeted back. “Sleep well?” he asked lightly but there was an undercurrent of concern.

Magnus placed his hands on his hips and squeezed. “With you? Always.”

Alec’s grin turned soft and his eyes sparked alight with emotion he now recognized as love. And god, he felt that reverberate deep within him. He felt the tremors of his heart and the rush of something that he hadn’t ever felt before. Rather than talk about how happy he was, he proceeded to show it.

Alec met him halfway, lips locking perfectly together. He knew every inch of them by now. He knew what made him moan and what made him quiver right down to his toes. And so did Alec. They made each other whole in ways nothing else could.

Magnus brought Alec down on him, wanting to feel every inch of bare skin on his own. The heat seeped into him and spread everywhere, making him flushed and erratic. Only too soon he wanted more. He wanted everything. Their kiss turned fierce, tongue clashing against each other for dominance. Magnus yielded wholeheartedly. He loved this feeling.

Alec rolled his hips down on his arousing erection and they simultaneous moaned. His hands roamed down at his sides, awaking fire at every movement. Magnus reached up to feel the naked skin as well. But his wrists were quickly gripped tight and stretched up his head.

“Alec.” Magnus was not ashamed to whine. He wanted to feel those glorious abs. Even though the binding motion sent a thrill of wanton need through him.

Alec grinned, his eyes twinkling with mirth and dark desire. “Tell me you don’t want this.”

Magnus half-heartedly glared up at him. “You play dirty, you know that?”

“Of course.” Alec quipped. His grip tightened around his wrists and he pushed them up on the headboard. “Because that’s how you like it.”

Magnus leaned up and sealed his lips over his. There was no use of words. Alec was after all right. If he couldn’t use his hands, he would use everything else to touch and feel Alec. He pushed his hips into Alec’s and groaned at the feel of his hardened cock.

Alec broke the kiss, gasping and shuddering. His pupils were blown wide with desire. “Keep your hands there.” He ordered, voice steady and commanding despite his appearance. Magnus nodded quickly excitedly. This would never get old.

Alec’s hands teased around the waistband of his briefs. His gentle touch was scorching on his skin. Magnus wiggled impatiently. His cock was already so hard. Thankfully Alec seemed to be on board. His briefs were off in a second and in the next, wet sinful lips closed over his throbbing head.

“_Alec_.” Magnus jerked in pleasure, his eyes rolling up in his head. His grip almost came undone from where he had been loosely hanging on.

Alec moaned around him and steadily took him all in, his hands clenched tight around his hips. He was sure he had permanent imprints of his hands on his skin by now. Just like he had them on his heart.

“Ale-xander.” Magnus panted, jutting his hips higher into the heat of his mouth. They had done this enough times that Magnus knew Alec’s limit. Which unsurprisingly was close to _nothing_. He easily swallowed his big length, all the while doing sinful out of the world things with his tongue.

Damn, Magnus was so lucky.

He didn’t have much sense or thoughts left in him after a few seconds of Alec pumping up and down, letting out just the right sounds that sent tremors down till the tip of his toes. He himself couldn’t pay heed to the obscene sounds he was making as he held on and rode through the intense pleasure. He was close as he shuddered with fragile control. He could almost taste his release.

“I a-am going to come, darling.” Magnus whispered feverishly, clenching his eyes shut. He let out a choked sound as Alec hollowed out his cheeks. It sent his entire body jolting with shock. “_Alexander_…” he couldn’t control it anymore. His release hit him quickly and harshly. He yelled out something incoherently, probably Alec’s name as he came. His breath left him suddenly, his entire body growing taut as the release tore through him. He could feel Alec’s mouth still on him, squeezing and tongue lapping up every part of him. That knowledge just made him dizzier and his chest grew tight with familiar emotions.

Magnus rode his climax slowly, his face burrowed sideways in his shoulders. His hands were still gripping the headboard tightly. He panted and heaved, trying to get a semblance of control back in his body.

Alec’s mouth disappeared from around his spent cock and a second later his weight came to settle on his chest. He could feel his equally panting breath into his sensitive naked skin as he sagged against him. He would never admit how proud he always was to see the impact he had on Alec during their sexual endeavors.

“Alec?” Magnus whispered, opening his eyes slowly and looking down at the tuft of black hair breathing into his chest.

“Hmmf?” Alec mumbled.

“Can I move my hands now?”

Alec lifted his head and Magnus bit back another groan at how deliciously ruffled he looked. And that stupid cocky grin did nothing to stave off his desire. “I didn’t think you would have been able to hold on.” He said smugly.

“You don’t know me at all, do you?” Magnus said. He pushed his hips up, making sure he touched him in all the right places.

Alec’s gaze darkened with desire, all vestiges of exhaustion sliding away. Magnus had experienced first-hand how much stamina he had. He licked his lips in anticipation. He was always up for round two. Hell, he was up for all number of rounds.

Unfortunately, his crisis of a life took that opportunity to intervene.

The shrill tone of his phone broke the spell around them. It was so loud.

“Why haven’t I kept that on silent?” Magnus banged his head back down on the pillow. “Or better yet shut it down?”

“Because you might get important calls giving you important information you shouldn’t miss at all.” Alec told him. “That is what you told me to tell you when you ask that.”

Magnus sighed loudly. “Knew it was mistake telling you that.” He muttered.

“Come on.” Alec started to sit up. He slapped the side of his thigh lightly. “If it were up to you, we would stay in bed all day. And all night.”

“You talk as if it’s all on me.” Magnus huffed. He quickly rolled over, wincing as his arms protested a little at the quick movement. His phone was vibrating violently on the table, lighting up with the name of the caller who had disturbed such a beautiful moment. He let out a long breath. “It’s Luke.”

Alec stared at him from where he stood by the side of the bed. He was still half dressed. Magnus hadn’t even gotten to him fully naked. “Talk to him. I’ll get in the shower.”

Magnus nodded. He was already picking up. He smiled once at Alec as he moved away. Then he focused all his attention on the call. “Hey, Luke.” He greeted. His voice still sounded a little rough.

“Magnus.” Luke sounded like he always did. Calm and strong. “We have another location.”

Magnus located his underwear at the bottom of the bed and started to put it on. “Where?”

“It’s a motel room she frequented a few times. By the looks of it, she never lived overnight.”

“So she was meeting someone?” Magnus queried.

“Could be. I tried to pull records but the motel is old and unreachable. Doesn’t look like it has many digital files. We’ll have to go there and have a look.”

“Alright.” Magnus agreed. “Send me the address. I’ll check it out.”

“I’ll come with you.”

“There’s no need. I can handle it.”

“I know.” Luke said in his reasonable tone, but this time there was an undercurrent of tension. “Look…you checked out all the other locations. This one was not even in the radar. But Simon followed a few threads and found it. Like I said, it is not Camille’s place. It’s just somewhere she frequented and never even stayed beyond an hour. There’s something about this one…”

Magnus bit his lip, feeling the tension pass over to him. “Could it be one of his hideouts?” he asked slowly.

Luke took a few seconds to answer. “It could be.”

Magnus swallowed hard. “Okay.” He said softly. “Come armed. We can’t go in unprepared if there _is_ something.”

“I will.” Luke said. “Meet me outside the precinct in half an hour. We’ll take my car.”

“Okay.” Magnus said and hung up.

This was some news. After days of hitting roadblocks after roadblocks, this could be something. If he could find even one of Jonathan’s hideout, he could unravel a lot of pieces. He could get _close_ to him.

He looked towards the bathroom door behind where Alec was having a shower. He wanted to go and join him. He wanted to spend all his time with him.

But, not yet. Once he caught Jonathan and ended that chapter of his life, then he could.

* * *

Luke was in a casual attire of pants and tshirt rather than his usual uniform. It was a little unnerving for Magnus to be with him like this. They had actually worked a lot of cases together when he was under him in the force. But now, time had passed and Magnus himself had changed from the boisterous cop that he had been.

But Luke was still his friend and they had more or less worked together for the past week, trying to find Jonathan. Magnus knew he could trust him with his life. And that was enough for him.

Luke picked him up a little ways away from the precinct in his car and soon they were making their way to the latest location. Magnus couldn’t keep his head exploding from anticipation and nervousness that usually came from following a promising lead.

“I have a small backup team standing by.” Luke announced after a while. “Just in case.”

Magnus narrowed his eyes. “I told you not to include anyone in this.”

Luke gave him a pointed look. “I didn’t tell anyone anything. It’s just a backup in case we need it. Simon’s there. And Raphael.”

Magnus let out a annoyed sound. “Raphael? Come on, Luke.”

“He is Simon’s partner. And he is very reliable and trustworthy.” Luke continued. “You know that better than anyone.”

“Which is the reason I never told him anything. I can’t get him into trouble because of me.” Magnus muttered.

“He won’t.” Luke promised. “All of us are doing this for a reason, Magnus. We are doing it to stop a cold blooded criminal. And to help you.”

Magnus sighed, leaning heavily back into his seat. “I just don’t want this to blow up in anyone’s faces.” He said shortly. He couldn’t go into the whole discussion of how it was all his fault and he had to be the one to pay for it.

“We’ll be careful about this.” Luke said earnestly. “Think with your head and be patient. No making hasty or risky plans.”

Magnus quirked his lips. “You really need new material for your captain pep talks.”

“There is no need. That is all that is important.” Luke said. Then he muttered under his breath. “Never could make you listen to them.”

They went over the new information a few more times. The motel was in the seedy part of the city, away from the crowd and hustle of people and shops. They had to ask around a few times for its exact location before they pulled in to the small parking lot. It was behind a gas station that had stopped working and a department store that didn’t look like it saw too many people. The sun was glaring down on them and Magnus felt irritable just looking at the bareness all around him. It was one of those areas that the government had just stopped looking into regarding development. They had quite a few around the city and it always ended up being a lair for the wrong people.

Like Jonathan. But still not him.

“I find it hard to believe that Jonathan would hole up in this dump.” Magnus said, walking around the car. Luke was removing something from the trunk. “Even for a running criminal, he has enough money to live like a fucking king.”

“Could be one of the bases. Or one of his minions.” Luke said. He closed the trunk, now wearing a jacket that Magnus knew was to conceal his holster and gun. “At least we might get some firsthand information about him or what he is up to.”

Magnus pursued his lips. “He is not the kind of man who just leaves clues anywhere.” He said thoughtfully. “But if it’s one of his men…that could be a big one.”

“Let’s find out.” Luke said. “Be alert.”

Getting to the room wasn’t hard. The reception was manned by a single lady who couldn’t care less about who they were. They hadn’t disclosed themselves as cops, just two men looking to see if the rooms were any good for a party. They had to play it under the wraps in order to not raise any alarms. There were no CCTV cameras or any digital records just like they had thought. It was pretty perfect for some shady business.

“Which room is it?” Magnus whispered as they climbed up the stairs to the first floor.

“The one on the far end. It’s the only one away from all the other rooms. The one beside it is for storage.” Luke informed him.

“Figures.” Magnus muttered. His heart had started to beat a little faster now. He felt a little off balance for some unknown reason. They walked together and came to stand in front of the door. It was locked.

“It’s a different bigger lock.” Luke said in a low voice. He looked around himself, eyes searching for hidden intruders or such. “This is definitely it.”

“I can pick it.” Magnus crouched in front of the door. “Keep a look out.”

Luke covered his back as he started to tinker with the complicated lock. “It’s been a while since I have been on field like this.”

Magnus huffed. “Are you sure you are up to it, old man? I would hold your hand but I am little busy breaking in.” He felt Luke glaring into the back of his head.

“_I_ taught you how to pick a damn lock.” Luke grumbled. “Ungrateful ass.”

Magnus chuckled. He focused back on the lock. It was a little complicated and completely out of place at the rundown motel. But he had been taught by the best. It took a few tricks but the lock clicked open after a few minutes.

“Done.” Magnus announced and got up. “How many points, chief?”

“It’s sloppy.” Luke commented. “Too many scratches.”

Magnus rolled his eyes before slipping on his serious mask. Luke nodded once, his hand firm on his holster. There wasn’t a chance of anyone being inside but they couldn’t take the risk. If this was one of Jonathan’s hideout, they had to be ready for anything.

Magnus pushed the door open. It creaked a little as it swung inside into darkness. He went in first, followed closely by Luke. His eyes quickly roved over the small space as light pulsed in from the doorway. There was no one inside.

He signaled Luke towards the small corridor that led to the bathroom. He continued his scrutiny of the room as Luke went ahead to check the bathroom.

As soon as he opened the door, he knew. Something cold passed through him way before Luke’s eyes widened and his head snapped towards him. He almost didn’t take a step ahead. He knew deep down that whatever was in there would not be good.

But he took that step anyway. And he was right.

* * *

Magnus wasn’t sure what hit him first. The body in the bathtub or the photos stuck haphazardly on the mirror above the sink.

He took it all in but he couldn’t process anything. Not for a long time but was after all just a few minutes. He stood in the doorway, gazing at the gruesome reality of it all.

The photos were what had him in deep shock that he couldn’t think at all. It was him. And not just him.

It was him with Alec.

His eyes flew over each of them. Each memory he had made with Alec. Their first date where they were standing outside the restaurant. Them walking down the street that one time having ice-cream. Outside the movie theatre holding hands. One near Alec’s club. Holding hands again.

And the last one. The two of them sitting by the side of the road where they had confessed their love for one another.

Magnus felt bile rise in his throat and he moved away. His legs felt weak and he stumbled against something, the bed, before falling down on his knees. His chest felt tight, he couldn’t breathe properly.

“Magnus!”

Luke was kneeling in front of him, his hands gripping him hard around the shoulders. “Hey, come on.” His voice seemed really loud.

“Luke…” Magnus breathed out, squeezing his eyes shut. He couldn’t deal with this.

“Snap out of it, Magnus.” Luke said earnestly. “Don’t lose it on me now.”

“Alexander.” Magnus turned wide eyes on him. “I ne-ed to get to him.” He started to get up.

“Wait a second.” Luke said, tightening his grip.

“No. _No_.” Magnus swallowed hard. His hands were shaking, he noted idly. “He knows. God. He’s not safe. I need to keep him _safe_.”

Luke held up his phone. “Look, I am going to call him. We will make sure he is safe. Just _calm_ down.”

Magnus pressed a hand to his head. There were too many thoughts, too many worries. He couldn’t think straight. Only thing he could focus on was Alec. He had to make sure he was alright. He snatched the phone out of Luke’s hand and started to thumb in the digits. His hands were still shaking.

“Magnus, just breathe for a second. You will worry Alec or else.” Luke said softly.

He was right. He took in a deep breath and let it out. By the time, Alec picked up, he had a bit of control back. But not enough.

“Hello, Luke.” Alec’s smooth voice came over the line.

Magnus almost collapsed in relief. “Alexander..It’s me.”

His tone changed immediately to surprise and warmth. “Magnus? Hey. Why are you calling from this number?”

“Where are you?” Magnus quickly asked, unable to keep his voice steady.

He could visualize the small frown on his face. “At the office. You sound odd. Are you okay?”

“Did you take your car?”

“Yes.” Alec replied. “Talk to me. Are you okay?”

“I am fine, Alec.” Magnus clenched his fist tightly. “Just…just stay there, okay? Don’t go anywhere.”

“Are you in danger? Where are you?” Alec didn’t seem to listen to him.

“Alec, just do what I say!” Magnus bit out. “I am with Luke. I will come get you shortly. Just stay in your office. Don’t go out alone anywhere. Am I _clear_?”

There was a short silence at the other end. Suffice to say, he had never acted like this before with Alec. “Yes. Don’t worry. I’ll be right here.” He promised.

Magnus let out a shaky breath. “I’ll see you soon. I love you.”

“I love you too. Be safe please.”

Magnus hung up and threw the phone on the bed. Luke was silently standing in front of him, gazing at him with trepidation and worry.

“Magnus.” He started. His eyes flew towards the bathroom. “Do you know that man?”

The dead man in the bathroom. Magnus hadn’t gotten a good look at him. But he was good with faces. “He is the one who has been following us around. I had seen him around a few times. But I never connected the dots.” He said numbly.

“He is one of Jonathan’s men.” Luke concurred.

“I always suspected Jonathan kept tabs on me.” Magnus murmured. “But not like this. How could I have missed this?”

He had always let his defense down when he was with Alec.

“You can’t beat yourself up about this.” Luke said, taking a step towards him. “We need to think about what to do next.”

Magnus chuckled humorlessly. “Next? He has always been a step ahead of me. All this time.”

“Do not give up.” Luke said ferociously. “There has to be something here. That man. He will lead us to Jonathan.”

“He set this up for me to see.” Magnus said, gesturing around himself. “He knew I would come here. He wanted me to _know_ all of this.”

Know how he had been looking at them, holding hands, gazing at each other, professing their love for each other…

Magnus felt sick again. He couldn’t do this.

“Hey.” Luke snapped him out of his thoughts. “We can’t stay here for long. I am going to call this in. You take the photographs and get out of here. I’ll handle everything else.”

Magnus swallowed hard. “Okay.”

“Get to Alec and stay low.” Luke instructed. “I’ll gather any evidence I can and contact you. You can’t just walk around now. You have to be careful.”

Magnus nodded. “I know.”

“It’s going to okay, Magnus.” Luke said, gripping his arm. “Just keep your head down and don’t do anything stupid.” He took his phone back and started to walk away, making a call.

Magnus stepped inside the bathroom. He had to face it. He looked down at the man, a slightly familiar face. Why hadn’t he ever felt him stalking them?

He had died clean and easy. A single bullet through the center of his forehead. He just knew that Jonathan had done it. The man hadn’t expected it. He probably had expected some kind of a reward for the latest set of pictures and updates. But he hadn’t realized he had outgrown his need. There was a reason this man was dead. And that was because Jonathan had all he needed.

He was ready to end this.

Magnus turned towards the pictures. Strategically, he looked over them all. They had started with their first date. The angle was far away. If he hadn’t been in that scenario, he would have to take a closer look to recognize the two people in it. He went back through all the times in the photos and tried to remember his blind spots. It had always been crowded and dark. So it would have been fairly easy.

Except for that last photo. The two of them sitting by the side of the road. It had only been two nights ago. It should have been practically impossible for anyone to follow them and stand across the road all the time they had been there.

Impossible for anyone but Jonathan.

He plucked the photo off the mirror. Jonathan had been there. He had clicked it. He turned the photo around and wasn’t surprised to see the writing there,

_It has been a while, hasn’t it?_

_Come see me. Tomorrow. At the last place and time we saw each other._

_Come alone. For old time’s sake, eh?_

Magnus was right. Jonathan was ready to end this.

And this time so was he.

* * *

The way his day had begun, Alec had not expected neither hoped for it to derail so horribly. He had given an amazing blowjob to the man he loved, he had closed a deal and secured a new profitable club in the city and he had eaten his favorite steak meal from his favorite steak house.

And then Magnus had sneaked in from his company’s fire exit, looking all stressed and haggard. After assuring himself that he was completely fine, he had reluctantly recounted a short version of where he had been and what he had found.

“Shit.” Was all Alec could say after he had taken in the utter breach of privacy in front of him. He felt his skin crawl and his chest turn cold as he looked at every picture, every memory of the two of them together. The date, the movies, the clubhouse…

“Was it Jonathan?” Alec asked quietly. “Who followed us and clicked these?”

Magnus shook his head. He was not quite looking at him, instead focused down on the pictures on his table. The disturbed look in his eyes was reflected in his own. “One of his men. He’s dead now.”

Alec barely held the flinch. Magnus was used to this kind of harsh reality. He was not. “He set it up for you to find?” Yet in a way, he wasn’t scared. He didn’t feel threatened. He didn’t know if it was because of his history with Jonathan or because he was with Magnus.

“Yes. Ahead of me. Again.” Magnus said.

Alec frowned. The worry he felt coursing through him was all for the man sitting in front of him. There was a certain calmness in him. He was struggling with everything but he was in control. It should have been comforted Alec but it only made him uneasy.

“How did he do this?” Alec sighed, rubbing his head.

“I am almost certain it’s your car.” Magnus said steadily. “He must have put a tracker.”

Alec shuddered. “Jesus Christ.” He swore. “All this time.”

Magnus let out a harsh breath and leaned forward. He collected all the pictures and put it back in the envelope he was carrying. “Don’t worry, Alexander. He won’t get to you.”

Alec gaze hardened. “He won’t get to _either_ of us.” He said firmly. “We need a plan. He’s too close now. We have to call in reinforcements, Magnus.”

Magnus was quiet for a few seconds. “I have a plan.” He said. “I will remove the trackers from your car. I am sure that’s the only one. Then, you will pack up and leave for a hard earned vacation. Maybe London. Or India. Those are some good options.”

Alec’s mouth fell open. He had to repeat that in his head before he could completely understand it. “_What?”_

“Like you said, he is too close.” Magnus said calmly. “And these photos prove that he knows about us. It’s hardly a coincidence that you share a history with him. You are not safe from him. Not anymore.”

“So you want me to _run_ away?” Alec asked incredulously.

“I want you to be safe!” Magnus said through gritted teeth. Alec couldn’t see it but he knew his fist was clenched tight under the table. “I was stupid enough to not realize that I was putting you in his radar by simply being with you. Don’t you see? This is a fucking platter for him. He gets me. And he gets _you_ as well. I can’t have that.”

“He is not getting anyone.” Alec said fiercely. He got up from behind his desk and walked towards where he sat. In a motion that was so familiar by now, he knelt down in front of Magnus and took his hands in his. They were cold. “We can figure this out, okay? I knew the risks when I agreed to be with you and to work on this together. I am not running away and leaving you alone to deal with him. That is _never_ going to happen.”

Magnus’ façade finally cracked a little. His calm demeanor gave way to the fragile look of barely handling his fear and stress. His gaze spoke of a deep pain and his hands shook a little. “Alexander…” he whispered roughly. “This is _my_ fight. You are done with him. I cannot bear it if anything happened to you. It would break me.”

Alec’s heart broke at his naked anguish. He pressed a gentle hand on his cheek. “You are I are one now. Your fights are my fights. And you think you are the only one who would break?” Alec asked. “I will do anything you ask of me. Anything except abandoning you.”

Magnus looked like he wanted to say more. His expression crinkled into something but before he could figure it out, Magnus was throwing his arms around him and burrowing his face in the crook of his neck. He felt him heaving and shaking as he hugged him hard. Alec responded willingly and rubbed a hand down his back, soothing him.

“It’s going to be okay, Magnus.” Alec whispered, pressing a kiss to the side of his neck. “I promise you. I’ll always be by your side.”

Magnus just seemed to sag more against him as if his words were causing him unknown pain.

Little did he know, they were.

Because those words were exactly Magnus knew he would hear. But had hoped against hoped that he wouldn’t have to.

* * *

Everything was going according to Magnus’ plan. His screwed up sort of suicidal plan that is.

He had removed the road trip photo and hid it safe with him. He had managed to stall Alec from taking any action. And he had managed to have a normal candle light dinner and made love with him all the while feeling the pressure in his heart that it might be for the last time. Magnus hated all the lying and convincing he had to do to him.

But it was in the end all for Alec.

His head was full of overlapping thoughts about what he was going to do tomorrow. He still didn’t know. All he knew was that he was finally going to confront Jonathan. He was finally going to go face to face with the man he hated with every part of his being and who had almost destroyed his life and who he was.

He knew that Jonathan had the upper hand here. He was winning until now. He had been playing a game with him and Magnus was walking right into his playground for the final showdown. He knew in a way he was totally helpless.

But for the first time, he wasn’t scared. He was strangely calm about the coming ordeal. He had struggled and shed tears of blood for the past two years. And now he had a small chance to do what he had been wanting to.

End Jonathan Morgenstern once and for all.

Except that there was just a tiny hitch in his agenda now. The man sleeping beside him. Alec had crashed into his dilapidated life and turned everything upside down all over again. Only to straighten it out and make him a little bit whole. If he had been in this place three months back, he would felt completely different about facing Jonathan tomorrow.

But now he had Alec and his past. And his future.

Ending Jonathan came way behind protecting Alec. He would do anything for him. He hadn’t realized until it was too late that he had been dragging Alec into his mess of a life. That he would be exposing him to the harsh reality of his life.

And Alec already had a horrible history with the monster.

Magnus’ heart clenched again as he thought about it. The thought of Alec facing him in any way was horrifying. He would do anything to stop that from happening.

“I am sorry, darling.” Magnus swept a soft black curl off his forehead. His face was set in peace and deep sleep. Courtesy of the single sleeping pill he had mixed in his drink tonight. Alec would be asleep for a long time.

“I know you truly believe that we could do this together.” Magnus continued in a whisper. “I know you believe that you can make me whole. But this is my fight. And this is the right thing for me to do to undo my wrongs. You have to let me do this alone. I know it’s hard but you have to.”

Magnus wished Alec were awake and listening to him. He wished he would understand him. But then that would mean that his love was not true. And that was the one thing Magnus was completely sure of.

“Somehow you truly love me.” Magnus said, head settling down near his. “I am the luckiest man in the world. And I love you too. So much that it scares me. I will be worthy of your love, Alexander. Just let me do this and I will do everything it takes to be with you for always.”

_If I survive…_

Magnus’ throat closed up at the thought. A few months ago, death didn’t scare him. He had actually been ready for it if it ever came in his crusade. But now…he didn’t want to leave. He wanted to live. For Alec. With Alec.

Magnus sniffed. He wanted to see his eyes again. To see the love shining from them for him. He will not think about never seeing them again. He was going to fight and he was going to win.

“I will end him.” Magnus promised. “For all he did to you. For all he did to me. I will do everything I can and I will end him.” He took a deep breath and looked at his face one more time, locking away every inch of it. “I just hope…that you find it in yourself to forgive me, my love. That you will understand why I did it. That all I ever wanted was to keep you safe.”

Magnus shuffled closer to him and rested his head against his. His presence soothed and calmed him like always. He would have this one night. He would gain this strength and keep it with him.

He will do it tomorrow.

And just maybe then, he could finally build his life back up again. With the man beside him.

* * *

TBC

**Author's Note:**

> At least you had the I love you's before all the angst, eh?
> 
> How do you like it?  
The next update will have the big showdown. Magnus' past finally. Yay!  
Also, it will be a little while before I can post the new one. I am moving to Ireland in a week now! So at least for the next two weeks. Bear with me. And thank you for the all the support and love <3 <3
> 
> Take care<3


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